Gordon Ramsay is never one to shy away from a culinary critique, and it appears not even Halloween candy is safe from his wrath.

In a segment on Jimmy Kimmel Live on Tuesday night, the chef gave a predictably expletive-ridden rant about the 5 worst candies you can hand out to trick-or-treaters on October 31. “This Halloween, excited young children will come to your door with bags open,” he began. “Now, you have a choice: You can give them something good to eat, or you can give them…”

1. Smarties

“The perfect combination of Aspirin and Tums,” he remarked after dramatically spitting the candy all over the floor.

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2. Circus Peanuts

“Look at it, how f—ing sad are they? You know what Circus Peanuts are? Clown s—!”

3. Candy Corn

“Come on: It’s not candy; it’s not corn. It’s earwax formed in the shape of a rotten tooth.” (Many would disagree.)

4. Apples

“Do I look like a f—ing teacher, mate? Go buy some proper f—ing candy.”

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5. Pennies

“In 2016 you’re still giving out f—ing pennies?!”

If you want to ensure that yours is not the house that all the kids avoid this Halloween, check out our round up of the best new Halloween candies on the market this year. We think even Chef Ramsay would approve.